A Suitor for the Princess - Chapter 47

                            “I could kiss this good girl and spend the rest of the afternoon here with you Martha, but I’ve an urgent meeting lined up later this evening, so I’ll reserve my treat for another day.” As she saw the wicked gleam in his eye, she realized that he was pulling her leg. She blushed a deep red and lowered her eyes for some moments. To change the mood, she asked, “Norman how’s Nancy? I am sure that you are regularly in touch with her. Can you take me to meet her? I’d really like to have a nice long talk with her.”

                          “I wouldn’t advise you to do so, dear. For her, the end is near. Maybe seeing you would disturb her greatly. Besides you yourself need rest and …………..” he realized his faux pas and fell silent. As he saw Martha’s sad face, he knew that he had touched her raw nerve. “Sorry, but let’s be practical.” He rose, kissed her as she walked with him to the door and waved to her as she stood on her porch, a lonely and tense figure. She hadn’t really needed Norman to underline her ‘condition’ so bluntly. Maybe he was tactless!

                            She was so disturbed that she couldn’t sit still. As tears threatened to spoil the rest of the afternoon, she decided that she wouldn’t wallow in self-pity, but make good use of her time. Suddenly she chuckled as she found that her legs had automatically taken her to her desk. She wiped away the tumbling tears, sat still for a moment and started from where she had left off in the morning.

                            The week before the marriage was the worst period in his life. He was torn between an intense longing for Myara and duty towards his beloved mother. He had pondered over the possibility of his mother warning Myara to stay away from him. Why else would she not come before him? Whenever he saw her in the distance, walking with the happy Princess, he’d feel as if heart would stop beating. Would he never get a chance to talk to her again? Find the truth? He wanted to at least profess his deep love for her and let her know that he would always be hers; come what may!

                            Of course, that would in a sense mean betraying Sara and the trust of her parents, but he didn’t have a choice. The heart always chooses its own path. Now his heart was clamoring only for Myara. How long would his marriage last, he wondered. With this thought, a more worrying problem raised its head in his already troubled mind. Would he be able to have conjugal relations with Sara? Surely he would be expected to father an heir to the throne of Regina?

                              On the other hand, whenever Myara sensed him looking at her soulfully, her heart twisted with unbearable misery. She couldn’t even show her discomfort before Sara. Her best friend who had stolen her beloved! She knew that she was being unfair as it was the other way round! She or rather her heart had stolen Sara’s suitor. She should have known that she was playing with fire even as she had felt the first stirrings of love for Juan. Why hadn’t she quashed them right away? She had no answer. Now she faced a lifetime of loneliness and despair without her soul-mate.

                              The sharp ringing of the phone made Martha jump from her skin. So engrossed was she in weaving her story that she was irritated with the unwanted interruption. She thought of ignoring the call but then decided against it. If it was Norman’s, he’d be more cheesed with her. After all, he only wanted her well-being! “Hello?” She inquired softly. A somewhat familiar, deep voice with an Asian accent made her feel rejuvenated and excited. It was John D’ Costa. “I hope that I am not disturbing you Mara. I just wanted to hear your voice. It has been so long since we’ve spoken to each other.” She felt warmth coursing through her veins. This was real pleasure. Hearing that someone missed you! Wow!

                              She took a deep breath that sounded like a sigh to John. “I hope you are in good health Mara. I am worried about you. Would you mind telling me what’s going on? Why has Norman literally kept me away from you, you know, with your transfer elsewhere and all that nonsense? Are we some brats who have to be separated to be kept from quarreling all the while?” He sounded so earnest that Martha laughed loudly into the receiver. She was imagining young siblings who earned that punishment, not grown-ups like her and John!

                             “Relax John. Norman only has my best interests at heart.” She debated whether to tell him the truth or keep mum. But she felt that he’d feel better on knowing the truth. She decided to ask John to refrain from mentioning it to anyone in the office; including Norman. “I’m sure that you are astute enough to realize that I am suffering from a psychiatric disorder. You see, I have been writing a novel for long, now. I have, of late, started hallucinating and imagining that I am surrounded by the characters in my novel. I know that I may sound silly to you. But this is the truth. I’ve been to a psychiatrist with Norman.”

                             Impatiently, John butted in. “But what has all this to do with our working separately? I just don’t see the point.”

                            Wearily, Martha said, “Please have patience John. I’m getting to the point. You resemble the hero of my novel. His name is Juan.”

                            She waited to hear the loud hoot of laughter that rang down the line. No doubt John was highly amused and thinking that the charade was being carried too far! She was happy to just hear his voice. She felt wistful, just like Myara. There, she was as it again! She came back to earth and pleaded, “John I’ll disconnect the call if you don’t hear me out and keep interrupting time and again.” Sensing the seriousness in her voice he sobered and said, “O.K. shoot!”

To be continued... 

The copyright of this novel is with Mrs. Priya Ramesh Swaminathan.

A Suitor for the Princess - Chapter 45

                       Though very affable, Norman could prove to be a formidable opponent. Besides, he didn’t want to seem ungrateful to his employer, to whom he owed a lot. It was Norman who had taken him under his wing, mentored him and trained him to become a thorough professional who now excelled in his job. It would be terribly unfair to steal his fiancée. He knew about Norman’s struggle to run his enterprise and manage his ex-wife Nancy’s distress. Yes, Norman was a kind person and deserved happiness after a long period of loneliness and celibacy. But didn’t he too deserve any happiness? thought John unhappily.

                         Then he consoled himself that whatever happened, happened for the best. Maybe it was good that Martha no longer worked with him in his department. It would’ve been agonizing working with her, especially since he had discovered that he loved her. Could he have refrained from watching her with loving eyes or longing…..? He sobered as the thought struck him that he wasn’t ever destined to be with his beloved for long. This time, the relationship hadn’t even begun before fate had tricked him again. Maybe he wasn’t lucky!

                          That night, Martha couldn’t stop thinking about both Norman and John. Both cared for her in their own ways. Norman was only following Dr. Hussey’s instructions for her ‘safety’ and well-being. She was sure that that idea had been his. John must have surely resented Norman’s decision but couldn’t go against his Boss. She could ‘feel’ his feelings. She was so attuned to him! Life wasn’t fair but one had to take chances. She made up her mind that she’d meet John the next day, by hook or crook, if he was in the office. To hell with Norman and caution! She laughed at the rhyming words.

                          Happy with her decision, she felt buoyed enough to consider continuing her novel. She deliberately ignored the warning bells in her head and the soft voice of Dr. Hussey that had cautioned her against that endeavor. She felt like a small girl defying her father’s strict instructions. Children loved to disobey their elders. Now she was one such child. She was gleeful.

                            She had to read the entire last chapter to get the hang of it again. She had to make Juan chose between the two leading ladies, Sara and Myara. Either she could make him a King, a disgruntled King who had been forced to live with his beloved forever or she could again make him a pauper, a poor peasant who would have to struggle for his existence along with his beloved Myara by his side. She paused to think about what she would have done if she had been in Juan’s unenviable shoes. She would’ve definitely chosen the life of penury and bliss with her beloved. The word John popped up in her mind’s eye and she forced herself to shrug it away, just then. She didn’t want to mix her real and make-believe world. John wasn’t a pauper and hadn’t professed his love for her, as yet. Then she put pen to paper.

                            The Queen, Sara’s mother gradually began to tell Sara about the travails that the brave Juan had undergone for her sake. Just because he had lost an eye in the task didn’t mean that she should spurn his love. He had suffered a lot and he deserved a good life thenceforth. It was only fair that she should resign herself to her fate, count her blessings on getting such a courageous and handsome suitor and marry him at the earliest. The King was growing weary with age and wanted to hand over the responsibility of ruling the Kingdom to a younger and capable person. Juan had passed his test with flying colors as he had displayed exemplary bravery and patience. In fact he had put his entire life at stake and even forsaken an eye for the task. Now they owed him a brand new life.  

                            Then one day, out of the blue, Sara acquiesced. It was more due to Myara’s convincing powers rather than her mother’s pleas. Myara had told Sara that Juan loved her dearly and would be utterly heart-broken if she spurned him and it would be terribly unfair to him. Sara had believed her and ashamed at her insistence on a handsome external appearance rather than a heart of gold, she had quietly promised Myara that she would marry Juan and give him all the happiness that he truly deserved. She felt that she owed him that much! Besides, she wanted her parents to be happy too and her father to be relieved of his huge responsibility of running the Kingdom. Above all, she had realized that it was this very person whom she had been pining for so long.

                        Though shattered, Myara had maintained a brave front and genuinely congratulated her and Juan’s mother. She didn’t meet Juan. She knew that she was guilty and couldn’t face Juan. She had betrayed his love just so that she could become a martyr. Thus even her good intentions had come across as obviously selfish. She had behaved like a coward while everyone in Regina had been commending her bravery. But only she would know that it had been one of the most difficult and punishing decisions of her life. Her life would always remain incomplete without Juan. The wound would always fester. Life-long.      

                         When the King sent for Juan, he was puzzled as he had been asked to remain out of sight, as the Princess couldn’t bear to see him. With great trepidation, he appeared before the King and was stunned to see him flanked by the beaming Queen and a shy Sara. He was surprised when she looked straight into his eye and smiled. He noticed that she was dressed in a resplendent purple gown, had braided her hair with pearls and looked radiant as a bride. What was up? He suddenly felt uneasy as the full impact of the scene hit him like a bolt of lightening. The Princess had obviously reconciled to marrying him in spite of his handicap. 

To be continued.... 

The copyright of this novel is with Mrs. Priya Ramesh Swaminathan.

A Suitor for the Princess - Chapter 44

                      Martha was furious and despondent. She had started liking John and had looked forward to seeing him everyday in the office and talking with him. She now remembered one particular conversation of theirs. It had been raining heavily outside. After a tiring session of providing the finishing touches to a manuscript, John and she were unwinding for a while, during the tea-break, with mugs of steaming tea in their hands.

                       She had inquired about his background. “John, where do you hail from? Your name appears to be Anglo-Indian. Your features too look Asian, rather than European. I must say that they are very sharp and impressive,” she had laughed as she had said that. “Yes, you’re right. I am from India. My fore-fathers had worked for the British when they governed India. We stayed in the Cantonment at Kolkata, which was Calcutta in those days. I studied in a Convent school there.”

                       “When my father, who worked for a Central Government organization, was transferred to Delhi, I studied at a college in Delhi. I studied the Arts as I was particularly fond of Literature. I did a course in Journalism from the Jawaharlal Nehru University there. Then I worked  in some magazines and later decided to shift base here, when a friend of mine told me about a vacancy in this publishing house and have been here ever since, rising up the ranks to become a Senior Editor; and here I am!”

                     “But don’t you miss India? I’ve read that it’s extremely beautiful and has a very impressive culture. How I wish I could go there sometime in my life!” she said wistfully.

                      “Oh you bet, I do! But herein lies my bread and butter. I’ll definitely be going to settle down in India after my retirement. But I’ll be very lonely there.”

                       Astonished, she asked him, ”Why? I’m sure that you have family back there who’ll be certainly pleased to have you back.”

                     “I’m all alone in this world, Martha.” He said with a pained look in his eyes. My parents died a long while ago. I have no siblings. I have lost track of my other relatives. No one has kept in touch with me all these years. It has been “Out of sight, out of mind!” for them probably. To be honest, I have also been negligent and avoided getting in touch with any of them. Here, after I fell in love with Sarah, life was bliss till we were engaged. Then she went on that fateful skiing expedition and left me alone all over again. Guess I am destined to stay alone!”

                       Even as she saw the half-smile that pulled at his lips, she saw the deep anguish in his eyes and felt his despondence in his drooping shoulders. She felt a strange sensation tugging at her heart. She was confused. Was it sympathy? Empathy? Or some deeper, as yet unacknowledged emotion? She sprang upright as it suddenly struck her like a bolt from the blue. It was love. She loved him, from the bottom of her heart, but had kept pushing it from her memory. Her life was quite complicated, as it was. She didn’t want to push the envelope any further. She wouldn’t be able to bear it if he was hurt all over again.

                       He had continued their conversation, unaware of her inner turmoil at the revelation that she had just experienced. “And mind if I ask you about your family background?”

                      She responded, “Well, I am also all alone in this world. My parents died in an air-crash, several years ago. I am a spinster as you know. I didn’t have any siblings and I remember pestering my Mom for a sister or a brother. But my parents had decided to have only one child so that they could give her the best opportunities in the world. I was the apple of their eyes. Though I was spoiled rotten by them, I was very level-headed even as a little girl. I was studious and hoped to make my parents proud of me some day and I did. When I got a job as a local correspondent in Surrey, where we lived, they were in the seventh Heaven.“

                        “They were people of very modest means so my job meant the world to them. It was a proper job as compared to the seasonal jobs that they both did, for a living and to make my life. As our financial condition improved we bought a modest apartment there. Life was hunky-dory till I sponsored a trip abroad for them. It was what they had wished for throughout their lives. They were to spend a week in France in a chateau. I still remember how they had jabbered excitedly about their forthcoming trip to all their friends and acquaintances, not forgetting to mention the fact that their beloved daughter had sponsored it for them and made their dream come true. I still curse that fateful day when that trip turned fatal as the plane crashed due to bad weather. There were no survivors. My world was shattered.”

                        As she sobbed on recounting that nightmare, John’s heart went out to her and he placed a warm palm on her hand on the table. They shared a silent look of understanding. He remained silent till she felt better and then brought her another cup of tea.

                        From then onwards the bond between them had strengthened. It was as if two lonely souls had united for company. John had been very drawn towards her, but had maintained a polite distance. After all, she was his Boss’ fiancee, though he wished that she was his! He had realized that she was capable of becoming his soul-mate.

                       He found comfort in her company and was very attracted to her physically. Whether this feeling could be termed love, he didn’t know. He had always felt that true love grew over the years, as good wine matured with age. With Sarah, he had just about reached that stage over seven long years. Martha’s association was still fairly new but he had an intuition that if watered, this sapling of love could mature into a solid oak tree. ‘If,’ he winced. Norman, his Boss was to be considered! 

To be continued....

The copyright of this novel is with Mrs. Priya Ramesh Swaminathan.

A Suitor for the Princess - Chapter 43

                                Seeing how innocent she looked when she laughed, the Doctor couldn’t help saying, “You look wonderful when you smile, Madam. In fact, beautiful is the word.” As she colored, he quickly reigned in his appreciation, seeing that she could feel uncomfortable. He had broken his life-long rule of not commenting on a client’s physical appearance, ever. He wondered why he had done that just then. He was inexplicably drawn towards Martha.

                                 He shook himself mentally and said blandly, “I’m sorry if I’ve offended you, Madam. I just blurted out my feelings inappropriately.”

                               She laughed as she remarked gently, “On the contrary, I thank you for your compliment, Doctor. You’ve made my day.”

                              Deftly changing the subject, he said, “I hope you aren’t writing now. Are you enjoying your new job? Tell me about it.” As she narrated her experience, especially her fainting spells and the uncanny resemblance of John with Juan, her novel’s hero, the Doctor saw the root cause of her mental turmoil. She had been directly accosted, seemingly, by the very person whom she had been running away from; Juan, the hero of her novel. She would have to maintain a safe distance from her colleague, probably work in another department, if she had to recover. Otherwise the constant trauma of being reminded about him could do a lot of harm. He decided to tell Norman about it in private or through a personal phone call later. He didn’t want her to be distressed.

                          “I think that there is nothing drastically wrong with you. Please learn to unwind and enjoy life. Keep all your novel’s characters aside. Forget about them and come into the real world. All of us are there to help you. Meditate daily. Do deep-breathing exercises. Lastly, don’t dwell on unpleasant things. You are precious.” He corrected himself, remembering his vow. “Life’s precious. Embrace it. That will be all for today."

                         “Well, how did it go?” asked Norman, relieved to see her smiling; and her usual confident self. “Fine! Supposedly, nothing’s wrong with me. I’ve to just take it easy. For starters, let’s go for that movie.” He calmly told her to wait for him in the car as he had a word with the Doctor. Martha felt like a small kid with her Daddy. But she was glad to do as he said. She wanted to just enjoy herself. Not dwell on unpleasant things.

                         The Doctor was surprised to see Norman and relieved too. He told him to effect a Department change and keep Martha away from John. He briefed him about John’s resemblance to Juan, Martha’s novel’s hero. Norman groaned inwardly, but said “Of course, Doctor. Anything for Martha!” Dr. Hussey’s eyes narrowed. Norman was in love with Martha for sure. He felt awful. He was sure that the other gentleman, Arnold felt awful too.

                         The movie was a re-run of the classic “Gone with the wind”. Martha enjoyed herself thoroughly. Norman was also pleased to see her so relaxed. They later had dinner at an elegant restaurant, talking about things in general. Martha had a vague feeling that Norman was trying to appear normal and relaxed when something was evidently bugging him. She uneasily wondered whether Dr. Hussey had told him something worrying about her. Then she decided to just concentrate on the wonderful meal and not bother asking him about the same. Would it alter things? No, was the answer. So why worry? She’d take one day, rather each moment at a time. She didn’t want to lose the present for the future. Little was she to realize that the future, rather the immediate future involved working without John.

                            Norman cleverly avoided effecting the Department change immediately realizing that Martha was astute enough to notice it and link it to their visit to the psychiatrist. Instead, he sent John on outdoor errands the next day. Then he deputed him to attend a workshop instead of him, in London. That would take care of 4 days. Then there was the weekend when the office was closed. Initially, Martha didn’t find anything amiss. But when the next week Norman deputed her to work in the subbing section she saw red. She marched to his office to demand an explanation.

                            “Why did you ask me to work in the subbing section, Norman? I’ve been oblivious to the fact that you’ve kept John out of my sight for the past week. But now I have realized that there is more to it than meets the eye! Has Dr. Hussey asked you to see to it that John and I don’t cross our paths in the office; just because he resembles the hero of my novel?”

                            Embarrassed at being questioned so pointedly and accurately by Martha, Norman merely nodded in the affirmative. “Then I must be told what else the Doctor has advised about me!” she said peevishly. “Well, if you must know, he has asked me to keep John out of your sight, lest you have those recurring panic attacks and fainting spells. Even I feel that it is much better this way. Last week was a dream for me as you were fine, absolutely fine.”

                          When he saw the look of dismay on his face, he softened and embraced her. She pushed him away bitterly and said, ”But that’s taking the easy way out, Norman. For how long can you keep John and me apart? Don’t we work in the same office? At some point of time, we are bound to meet. Then what will you do? Now I’ve realized that you find me, rather my behavior embarrassing. Why don’t you just pack me off, home? Sack me.” Her eyes had filled with tears as she stormed out of his office.

                         Norman thought about her reaction and wondered what was brewing between his fiancée and his Senior Editor? He had some inkling but wanted to be sure. He now had to decide on his further course of action. He had failed miserably in his task.

To be continued.... 

The copyright of this novel is with Mrs. Priya Ramesh Swaminathan.

A Suitor for the Princess - Chapter 42

                             Norman deliberately kept the conversation friendly and cheerful throughout the drive to the psychiatrist’s clinic. He was uneasy about her aloofness at times but knew that she needed help, professional help, to get her act together. He was also preoccupied with Nancy’s health. He had received unsettling reports from her physician that her days were numbered and it was just a matter of time before she would be no more. As he flinched at the thought, he felt Martha’s arm on his arm and glanced at her anxious face. She must’ve sensed his discomfort and angst. She was a very perceptive woman. After all, she was a fine writer. He looked at her and smiled, much to her relief. His eyes were so gentle, like a calm sea. She felt relaxed in his company.

                              But Norman winced when she inquired about his ex-wife. “It’s Nancy, isn’t it? Has her condition deteriorated? I pray that she gets well soon and becomes strong and healthy, though I know that it’s easier said than done. Norman, isn’t it too taxing for you, managing all things at the same time, besides being saddled with my responsibility? I wish that I too become well soon and stop bothering you.” She said it in a very matter-of-fact tone and Norman was relieved that she hadn’t broken into tears. He hated wimpy women. In fact, Martha’s fierce independence had drawn him to her and he had hated to see her disintegrating into an emotional wreck. She had to pull herself together and he’d see to it!

                          Both of them had a light brunch at a Café, the same where Arnold had brought her the first time. She couldn’t help comparing Arnold and Norman just then. Well, both were sensitive, caring, dependable and handsome. But Norman was a little brusque and practical and Arnold appeared to be the die-hard romantic who wore his heart on his sleeve. Probably both of them loved her. But did she love any one of them? Now that was food for thought!

                          She chuckled as she realized that these days she was eyeing all the males who came into her contact as potential lovers and life-mates if not soul-mates! That was what happened after living a long and lonely life as a spinster. She was however glad that she hadn’t become hardened and cynical like some other spinsters whom she knew, who couldn’t appreciate the beauty of a wild rose nor enjoy the chirping of the song-birds.

                             “A penny for your thoughts?” Norman’s deep voice broke her reverie. “May I share the joke with you?” he asked with a warm smile on his tanned face. “I’m just feeling very light-hearted and carefree. I’m even wondering why on earth are we visiting the kind doctor! Can’t we go to the movies instead?” she fibbed. Now it was Norman’s turn to grin. We will, after the appointment is done with. Will it be O.K. if we reach home late tonight?”“Of course, Norman! It isn’t as if any one’s awaiting my arrival anxiously at home.” Then she remembered her story’s characters and kept mum. They’d have to bide their time, she thought as they walked, hand in hand into the clinic.

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                          Dr. Benedict Hussey greeted them warmly and soon got to the point. “Well, kindly brief me about your progress, Madam. Sir, kindly be seated outside. Thank you.” Norman smarted under his curt dismissal. He’d have liked to stay on in the Doctor’s chamber to know what was going on and see whether Martha responded to his queries faithfully. He doubted whether she even remembered what she had to brief the Doctor about! He knew that he was over-anxious but couldn’t help himself. He was genuinely worried about Martha and hoped that she recovered fully and soon.

                          He was hoping to get married before Christmas, if all went well. He couldn’t wait to have her by his side, living with him in his house. He had grown much attached to her. But he really wondered whether he’d have the patience to keep tending to her continually, if her fragile mental state continued for long. After tending to Nancy, day in and day out, he was tired, mentally and physically. He wanted a strong and healthy woman, not a weak and feeble one. He knew that he was over-reacting but he wondered about how long it would be before he lost his patience with Martha fully. He wanted things to be totally sorted out before the marriage. Otherwise, he was content to remain single and at peace. He was being selfish and mean but he knew that it was for the best, for both of them.

                             “…….. And now I am drawing parallels between the people whom I meet daily and my novel’s protagonists. I also think that I am the heroine of my novel! Doctor, please help me urgently. I think I’ll soon go insane,” Martha completed her tale of woe, even as Dr. Hussey breathed heavily, visibly affected by her impassioned plea. Obviously, things were going downhill for his beautiful client. She looked like a leaf tossed about in a storm. She even acted as one, clinging to any lifeline for succor. Now it appeared as if she had fully reposed her faith in him. If he went wrong or didn’t provide what she needed, she’d perish!

                               “I hope that you don’t smoke, drink or consume drugs, Madam. I’d appreciate it if you informed me about it, if you do!” Hearing her strangled cry, he knew that she was terribly offended. “No Doctor. I have never resorted to any of this stuff in my entire life and never will. But why did you ask?”

                               "You see, some intoxicating substances have hallucinogenic effects on the mind. As do some strong medicines. Hence I wanted to be doubly sure that you weren’t addicted to any of them. I also presume that you are not taking medication for any of your illnesses.”

                               ”No Doctor. In fact, I’ve visited a Doctor, that’s you, after say, 20 years! I’m proud to say that I look after myself very well.” “Yes, you certainly appear hale and hearty,” said the Doctor with a sudden chuckle. Martha was surprised to see that he looked so boyish when he laughed. Maybe he should do that more often she mused, laugh that is! Maybe his high-strung profession and the problems of his clients weighed down on him and made him brooding and morose. Now it was her turn to chuckle as she realized that she had been psycho-analyzing her Doctor, for a change.

To be continued.... 

The copyright of this novel is with Mrs. Priya Ramesh Swaminathan.